He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
