just come out here and I will go home with you...
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
