I puked a lego.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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