you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
It was confusing and full of hummus
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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