therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize