I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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