yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
