my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
