i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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