I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
