Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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