Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize