Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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