A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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