Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize