just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Randomize
