Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Randomize
