Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize