this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
