the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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