then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
