It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
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