this boner is exhausting
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Randomize
