butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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