$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
