He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
