Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize