Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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