3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize