Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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