My first STD was from a foam party
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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