He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
