would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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