i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Randomize
