Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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