Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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