I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
My pussy is not your playground.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
