let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
