HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
