you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize
