I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
