Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(416): View more from Ontario

but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it

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(417): View more from Missouri

on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.

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(702): View more from Nevada

What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs

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(226): View more from Ontario

This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon

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(504): View more from Louisiana

He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.

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(440): View more from Ohio

I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.

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(928): View more from Arizona

Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!

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(858): View more from California

Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.

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(281): View more from Texas

Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.

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