you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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