There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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