If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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