She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Randomize
