My first STD was from a foam party
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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