dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
