Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
