yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
